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It’s bonkers to be rude about breezy Bognor Regis: The ‘fourth worst seaside town in Britain’ has been ‘lovingly restored’ and boasts ‘Victorian charm’ and miles of beach

King George V’s convalescence in Bognor in 1929 after a long illness saw it granted the suffix ‘Regis’ but also gave rise to the irascible monarch’s most infamous quote. Clue: the word rhymes with ‘rugger’.

In fairness to His Majesty, he did arrive in February. Had he come during warmer months he might have had a more favourable opinion of the town.

Because Bognor is the ideal place for a summer escape – no matter what Which? magazine said last week, ranking it the fourth worst seaside town in the country.

What do they know? For a start, it doesn’t seem to get overcrowded. We arrived on a Saturday in late June and found parking places aplenty by the seafront.

The esplanade is more than two miles long, and securing bench space to gaze out and ponder big decisions – such as whether to go for scampi or cod and chips for lunch – wasn’t a problem. And the beach, if you fancy a dip, is safe with plenty of sand at low tide.

Which? magazine ranked Bognor Regis (above) as the fourth worst seaside town in the UK – but Neil Clark says it’s ‘ideal for a summer escape’ 

Neil finds Bognor Regis ‘doesn’t seem to get overcrowded’ even on a Saturday in late June. Seen here are the offshore sea defences at Bognor

With so many rundown traditional seaside towns it was refreshing to visit somewhere that’s received some TLC.

The historic seafront Grade II listed bandstand has been beautifully restored. The 1865 pier has survived storm damage, fires and a threat of demolition.

Adding to the Victorian charm, a miniature train runs along the promenade, and there are ice-cream kiosks, a mini-golf course and lovely gardens in Hotham Park, named after Sir Richard Hotham, who transformed the town from a small fishing village in the late 18th Century.

Besides royalty, down the years Bognor has attracted its fair share of literary and artistic visitors, including James Joyce, William Blake, Dante Gabriel Rossetti and composer Eric Coates, who wrote By The Sleepy Lagoon, the signature tune of Desert Island Discs.

‘The old town boasts splendid Georgian and Regency architecture,’ says Neil, as seen here on Bognor’s high street

The old town boasts splendid Georgian and Regency architecture – particularly handsome is the Grade I listed Dome House, built by Sir Richard to entice George III from Weymouth.

This is a lovely part of the world. Historic Chichester is only six miles away, and to the north lie the glorious South Downs.

If, like me, you enjoy horse racing, Fontwell Park, a jumps track which recently celebrated its centenary, is down the road. 

And close by is Goodwood, which has arguably the most beautifully Arcadian setting of any racecourse in Europe. This is where the ‘Glorious’ five-day flat race meeting starts on Tuesday.

A morning in Bognor followed by an afternoon at the races? Even grumpy old King George would have approved of that. 

Neil says: ‘The historic seafront Grade II listed bandstand has been beautifully restored’

Children enjoy afternoon tea at Ballifscourt, a ‘luxurious’ B&B in nearby Climping

Where to stay

Royal Norfolk Hotel is an 1830s Regency hotel where Emperor Napoleon III once stayed – doubles cost from £90 a night B&B (leisureplex.co.uk). 

For something more luxurious, Bailiffscourt in the nearby village of Climping has doubles from £325 B&B (hshotels.co.uk).

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It’s bonkers to be rude about breezy Bognor Regis: The ‘fourth worst seaside town in Britain’ has been ‘lovingly restored’ and boasts ‘Victorian charm’ and miles of beach



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